Episode 12
The Power of Silence: When Not Speaking Speaks Volumes
We all wear masks, concealing parts of ourselves that feel too raw, too vulnerable to reveal. But what happens when that mask turns into a self-imposed prison, trapping you in an inauthentic existence?
TyShaundra Davis knows this struggle all too well, as she found herself rejecting the profound meaning woven into the very name bestowed upon her at birth.
In this soul-stirring episode, TyShaundra Davis peels back the layers of her transformative journey from denial to radical self-acceptance. With refreshing candor, she recounts how a divine encounter shattered her resistance, unveiling the empowering essence of her name
—TyShaundra: Strong, Godly Leader. This revelation became the catalyst for her to boldly claim her truth and step into her purpose.
Join us for a deep and powerful conversation that explores the significance of silence, the courage to embrace your true identity, and the transformative power of stepping into your God-given purpose.
Connect with TyShundra:
Who God Says Podcast: https://www.whogodsays.com/
Website: https://sites.google.com/emeraldserve.com/emeraldservices/home
Connect with La'Quita:
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Transcript
Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back
Speaker:to another amazing episode of Laquita's
Speaker:Toolbox. I am your host, Laquita Mandley,
Speaker:and it is a fantastic day in the Lord, you
Speaker:guys. I know. I'm excited today because I
Speaker:have an amazing guest in the studio with
Speaker:me today. I want to introduce her and have
Speaker:you guys give her a very warm welcome in
Speaker:the Laquita's toolbox community, none
Speaker:other than Miss Tysaundra. And Tysaundra
Speaker:is a tax accountant and podcast host, and
Speaker:the name of her show is who God says.
Speaker:We're going to talk about that a little
Speaker:bit more in this broadcast, but right now,
Speaker:what I'd like for you guys to do is take a
Speaker:moment to hit those, like, share and
Speaker:subscribe buttons. And let's make sure we
Speaker:get today's episode out into the hands of
Speaker:as many people as possible. If you're new
Speaker:to the podcast, welcome, welcome, welcome.
Speaker:Consider hitting that subscribe button,
Speaker:ringing those notification bells so that
Speaker:you can receive notification when new
Speaker:episodes of Laquita's toolbox drop on
Speaker:Tuesday mornings at 05:00 a.m. central
Speaker:standard time. Miss Tysaundra, welcome to
Speaker:the show today. Ma'am. How are you? Hi,
Speaker:hi, hi. I am well. Good to hear you. You
Speaker:know what I'm doing. All right. I could
Speaker:complain about quite a few things, but we
Speaker:ain't gonna complain today. I'm gonna tell
Speaker:the Lord. Thank you. This is the day that
Speaker:you have made. I'm trying to rejoice and
Speaker:be glad in it. Thank you, Lord. Thank you.
Speaker:Amen. Amen. So, look, tell us more about
Speaker:who you are and what you do. Oh, who am I?
Speaker:I am Tyshondra in all my glory. Like,
Speaker:enough to. Right there? Yeah. Like, I
Speaker:tried to fight it for so long. I wanted to
Speaker:be everything else but Tyshondra. Oh, no,
Speaker:I did. I did. I didn't like my name. I
Speaker:didn't. I just didn't want to be
Speaker:tashonger. I was like, what is this mess?
Speaker:This is a whole mess right here. I wanted
Speaker:to be everything else. I wanted to be
Speaker:called anything else for that name. Yeah.
Speaker:God had to make sure he put that on.
Speaker:Explain to me what that was. Okay, why he
Speaker:gave me that name. I am the oldest of five
Speaker:that was raised by my dad. So I was the
Speaker:little mommy in the house then. I modeled
Speaker:after my father, like, with everything,
Speaker:how his mannerisms, his characteristics,
Speaker:everything. And I became the little man
Speaker:Mandev. And as I got older, had babies,
Speaker:got married, got divorced, started a
Speaker:business. I'm a tax accountant. I have a
Speaker:tax and booking practice called Emerald
Speaker:Services. So all of our services are
Speaker:online now. We're virtual due to the
Speaker:pandemic. All right, all right, all right.
Speaker:That's all right. And I opened other
Speaker:businesses as well. So when I was running
Speaker:from that name, God had to sit me down and
Speaker:show me there was a reason I gave you this
Speaker:name. Tysondra Strong, godly leader. There
Speaker:was a reason I gave you that name. Yes.
Speaker:Yes. That was the meaning. That's the
Speaker:meaning of my name. Come on now. Name set.
Speaker:Destiny. Come on now. Let's talk about it.
Speaker:But I ran from it. But hey, now that I
Speaker:know that we've, me and God has had this
Speaker:conversation and he made sure, you know, I
Speaker:couldn't pout about it anymore, I embrace
Speaker:it. I submit it to him. And I completely
Speaker:understand why, especially going through
Speaker:everything that I went through, I
Speaker:understand why I had to have that name
Speaker:spoken over me. That's amazing. That's
Speaker:amazing. Listen, guys, I'm going to leave
Speaker:you out there in the Laquita's toolbox.
Speaker:Audience have struggled with your name in
Speaker:some shape, form or capacity, whether it
Speaker:was your first name, your last name,
Speaker:slash, surname. For those of you that
Speaker:aren't american and or your, or your
Speaker:middle name, have any of you ever
Speaker:struggled with that part of who you are?
Speaker:Your name, because it's amazingly
Speaker:significant to understanding who we are in
Speaker:Christ and why we're here, what he created
Speaker:us to do. So if you have that struggle or
Speaker:you've had that struggle, what I'd like
Speaker:you to do, wherever you are listening to
Speaker:this broadcast, go ahead and reach out to
Speaker:us. And if you don't mind sharing, share
Speaker:about. Share with the community about your
Speaker:struggle with your name and what you've
Speaker:done to overcome it, or if you are still
Speaker:yet working through that, let's talk about
Speaker:that. And maybe someone in our community.
Speaker:And even in this conversation, we can
Speaker:bless you with some tips, tools or
Speaker:strategies that can help you grow past
Speaker:that struggle. And you can reach out to
Speaker:podcast acquittamonly.com. again, that's
Speaker:podcast acquittamonly.com. and let us know
Speaker:about. And share with us a bit about your
Speaker:story and your journey with understanding
Speaker:your name, accepting your name and being
Speaker:empowered by your name. Yeah. So you have
Speaker:that struggle with your name. The Lord
Speaker:took you through a process. He allowed you
Speaker:to go through a growth process where you
Speaker:can understand better, understand why your
Speaker:name had to be Tyshandra. And on the end
Speaker:of that, were you sitting in that space.
Speaker:Now, how much of that process, how much of
Speaker:you know, the things that you gleaned out
Speaker:of that process are you using for the
Speaker:success in your spiritual and natural
Speaker:life? All of it. Absolutely all of it. All
Speaker:of it. I've always been this no nonsense
Speaker:type person, and I think all of that came
Speaker:from my dad. And I'm actually learning
Speaker:that it's a masculine trait to see things
Speaker:black and white. And so I picked that up
Speaker:from my dad. It was like, either you're
Speaker:all in and you're all out. It's always
Speaker:been black and white. You do it this way
Speaker:or not at all. And that kind of. It
Speaker:traveled. It traveled. It went through my
Speaker:whole life with parenting, in marriage and
Speaker:relationships, in business, in pretty much
Speaker:everything. So just looking at who I was
Speaker:and who I'm supposed to be, it's like
Speaker:those traits, even though men sometimes,
Speaker:I'm gonna say sometimes, a lot of times,
Speaker:have problems with it, that was just the
Speaker:core of it. And I had to be refined. I had
Speaker:to be polished and molded, but that core
Speaker:of it was absolutely needed. I'm not timid
Speaker:about a lot of things that people are
Speaker:timid about. I'm not real good. I don't
Speaker:really have the kind of, and I'm going to
Speaker:say care. I don't care a lot about a lot
Speaker:of things that other people care about. It
Speaker:doesn't bother me. It's not, you know, I
Speaker:don't spend my time focusing on things
Speaker:that regular people focus on, what's on
Speaker:social media. I don't care whose baby
Speaker:daddy is, whose baby daddy. It's a lot.
Speaker:And so I know that I frustrate a lot of
Speaker:people, but that core had to be developed
Speaker:in me again. It had to be refined because
Speaker:I have a mouth. That mouth is piercing.
Speaker:Oh, my God. That mouth. Oh, my God. If God
Speaker:did not work on my mouth, I don't think I
Speaker:would be sitting here right now. And I
Speaker:just thought I was doing everyone a
Speaker:service of letting you know. I thought you
Speaker:needed to know, no matter how you felt
Speaker:about it. Now I feel like, yes, you should
Speaker:still be honest, and you should still tell
Speaker:people what they need to hear. But there's
Speaker:a way to express that. Yes. Yes. Wait.
Speaker:That's part of refining. Come on, now.
Speaker:Let's talk about that refinement process.
Speaker:How many of y'all need to be refined in
Speaker:Laquitus toolbox audience today of those
Speaker:that may be listening for the very first
Speaker:time? I can identify with you because, my
Speaker:God. Yeah, my mouth. My husband used to.
Speaker:And he'll tell me that today. So let me
Speaker:just be transparent. He'll tell me that
Speaker:today. So did you have to say that? And
Speaker:I'm thinking, do you know how many filters
Speaker:that went through before Ori came out?
Speaker:Lord have mercy. I might have to go back
Speaker:in my prayer closet for more filters. But
Speaker:you're right. You're right. It's, um. Even
Speaker:when I'm, even when I'm talking about that
Speaker:in, in the form of, you know, what is
Speaker:emotional intelligence or what is
Speaker:effective communication, I go back to
Speaker:what, what pops up in my mind as a theme
Speaker:from the Cosby show. And in this scene, it
Speaker:is when Vanessa brought Dabness home and
Speaker:wanted them to accept him. Dabnis was a
Speaker:great fellow. Vanessa, however, was shaky.
Speaker:And so as they got to know Vanessa, as
Speaker:they got to know Dabness, their irritation
Speaker:with Vanessa was like, tenfold. But they
Speaker:also knew she was going to drop Dabnis.
Speaker:But nevertheless, they're at the dinner
Speaker:table, and Cliff gives them a scenario. He
Speaker:told Dabnis, hey, think of your very
Speaker:favorite meal. Your very favorite meal.
Speaker:And Davness told him what that meal was. I
Speaker:can't remember what the meal is, but it
Speaker:was a great meal. And he said, now imagine
Speaker:me cooking that up to perfection just like
Speaker:you want it, and then taking my trash can
Speaker:lid, putting that food on the trash can
Speaker:lid, and then serving you that food. It's
Speaker:all about how you do it. Presentation,
Speaker:tone, everything. And so that seeing that
Speaker:as a kid and even as a young adult, it was
Speaker:just haha, funny. But, you know, as I
Speaker:matured, that scene makes so much sense.
Speaker:Yeah. And can be applied in every way. And
Speaker:that's what I, that's what I saw when I
Speaker:heard you talking about refinement. And
Speaker:even, you know, for those of you that
Speaker:might be saying, yeah, but you got to tell
Speaker:the truth. I ain't lie. You write, you
Speaker:trying to help them and bless them by
Speaker:telling them something because you
Speaker:recognizing something and you got a
Speaker:solution to the problem. How you
Speaker:delivering it matters. Yes, it didn't
Speaker:matter that that meal was perfect, what
Speaker:they wanted and what their body needed.
Speaker:You gave me, you know, a $200 meal, a
Speaker:$3400 meal. However, you know, the value
Speaker:of that meal is, and you put it on a nasty
Speaker:trash can. I don't want that. Turn that
Speaker:down and let all that go in the can. Like,
Speaker:yeah, value is no longer there. It's no
Speaker:longer there. So listen, y'all, I hope
Speaker:y'all taking notes. Miss Tashandra has
Speaker:been blessing us. If you new to the
Speaker:toolbox, let me tell you how we operate
Speaker:and how we float. We get something to
Speaker:write with and to write on, so that when
Speaker:these tools are blessing our hearts and
Speaker:minds, we, you know, we write that down,
Speaker:because that won't forget. We forget as
Speaker:humans, we flaw. We forget. But when you
Speaker:write that stuff down, you notate it. It
Speaker:don't forget. And you can always go back
Speaker:and learn more. But even in addition to
Speaker:that, don't hit that save button. So you
Speaker:could come back, rewind this episode, and
Speaker:watch it as much as you need to or listen
Speaker:to it as much as you need to in order to
Speaker:absorb these tools and then learn how to
Speaker:implement them. Yeah. So, you know, you.
Speaker:You walking through that refinement
Speaker:process, you know, like those of us that
Speaker:are real, you know, if you spiritually
Speaker:deep in this place, she was, you know, she
Speaker:was going through a period. She had done
Speaker:been delivered. Now she walking in her
Speaker:deliverance. Right? She's working at her
Speaker:sanctification of her mouth. Yes. You
Speaker:think it's like David said, he had to put
Speaker:a gait about his lips. That mean his mouth
Speaker:too? I mean, come on now. It was fly.
Speaker:Yeah. It got to a point where my sister
Speaker:told me the only time she would call and
Speaker:ask for any advice or anything was when
Speaker:she knew there was nobody else to call.
Speaker:Oh, my. Come on. How did. How did that
Speaker:make you feel? I was like, you should have
Speaker:just been called me. What you mean nobody
Speaker:else to call? I still didn't get it. But,
Speaker:like, my cousin told me she was going
Speaker:through something with a guy. And then she
Speaker:said, I told her I don't even remember.
Speaker:She asked me a question, I gave her an
Speaker:answer. She was like, do you even have
Speaker:feelings? That one I remember. And so I
Speaker:was like, oh, I'm human. I have feelings.
Speaker:But, yeah, you know, maybe I shouldn't
Speaker:have said it like that. That wasn't. I
Speaker:don't think she's like that. That was a
Speaker:little clicking moment. That was when it
Speaker:was like, oh, the light bulb went off. I
Speaker:can imagine your face being like, you
Speaker:know, how you. How you look when you. In,
Speaker:like, a light bulb moment. What? I was
Speaker:like, okay, okay, okay. Maybe that wasn't
Speaker:the best way to go about that. Okay. And
Speaker:then it was crazy. After that, my pastor
Speaker:asked, well, his wife at the time, she
Speaker:asked me to, um, help with the praise
Speaker:dance at the church. And I filtered that
Speaker:answer had to be 72 times before. That's
Speaker:when I really started to filter. Like to
Speaker:sit and filter. At first, it was like you
Speaker:were talking to a mute. It's like, did you
Speaker:hear what I said? Second breath of how to
Speaker:respond. Give me a minute. Oh, my
Speaker:goodness. Is. Look, y'all, for those of
Speaker:you that don't go to church, you gotta
Speaker:understand. Let me give you some
Speaker:background. So. But, yeah, a lot of my
Speaker:followers are creatives. You know, whether
Speaker:you're in the music industry, whatever,
Speaker:you some type of creative. It ain't no
Speaker:different in church than it is outside of
Speaker:church. As creatives, we tend to be a
Speaker:little tender. Yeah. And a whole lot of. I
Speaker:won't say a whole lot of crazy, but a
Speaker:whole lot of different. Now you got a
Speaker:group of them. Yep. And she is a no
Speaker:nonsense person that has just learned. I
Speaker:just can't say everything the way I. You
Speaker:know, my first thought to say, I probably
Speaker:should think it twice. Yeah. And now she's
Speaker:being asked to work with a bunch of
Speaker:emotional people. Yes. Did your heart
Speaker:skip? And they were all teenagers. Oh, my
Speaker:God. Oh, my God. We were all teenagers.
Speaker:And I'm like, in this generation of, you
Speaker:know, well, this is my truth. You might
Speaker:have wanted to say something towards that
Speaker:little truth, what you do. Oh, my God. So
Speaker:I was like, okay. The first thing that
Speaker:came out was excuse. Cause I was like,
Speaker:well, I don't have any formal training to
Speaker:do. I'm not formal, you know, I don't know
Speaker:anything about. And she was like, oh, no.
Speaker:You know, it's just like, you're just
Speaker:expressing yourself and let the music hit
Speaker:you, and whatever God gives you, you just
Speaker:move that way. And I was like, but they
Speaker:can do that without me. You know, they
Speaker:don't need me to do that. And I'm like, in
Speaker:my head, what kept popping up was, oh, no,
Speaker:ma'am. You did cheer, you did gymnastics,
Speaker:you did dance in high school. And I'm
Speaker:sitting in the back of my head like, shut
Speaker:up. I don't have training, is what I hear.
Speaker:That's what I hear. I'm like, shut up. I
Speaker:didn't go to Juilliard dance school. And
Speaker:none of this. I'm not doing this. I can't
Speaker:do this. She was like, her daughter. Oh,
Speaker:well, she does ballet and everything, so
Speaker:she can help you out. And I was like, but
Speaker:why don't she do it? And then you have
Speaker:someone else that, you know. It was a
Speaker:whole bunch of excuses. The excuses came
Speaker:out first, and then she was like, well,
Speaker:how about this? How about we just go to my
Speaker:house, we bring all the girls, and you
Speaker:just see what comes out. And I was like,
Speaker:okay. The whole time I sat there and I let
Speaker:her see what came out, like she was doing
Speaker:it, and. And I was like, yeah, that looks
Speaker:nice. Yep, yep, that looked nice. And I'm
Speaker:just going through my head, like, I want
Speaker:to say this, but I can't say that. I can't
Speaker:say that. No, I can't say that. Oh, she
Speaker:gonna put me out her house if I say that?
Speaker:It was just the whole time I sat in a
Speaker:chair and I watched, and I had to keep my
Speaker:mouth closed. That was hard. Hard. I
Speaker:understand. So hard. Like, it. It is. So,
Speaker:people, listeners, listen, we're not
Speaker:saying this is easy. As Tashandra just
Speaker:said, this part of your. Your growth. This
Speaker:part of your growth. Um, and this is
Speaker:important for every aspect of your life,
Speaker:uh, personally and professionally, your
Speaker:growth in knowing what to say, when to
Speaker:say, and how to say it in order to
Speaker:effectively communicate to your intended
Speaker:audience. Right? And so here with this,
Speaker:she had two intended audiences. One is the
Speaker:leader over it, ie supervisor, you know,
Speaker:ie customer, as it were, or. And she had
Speaker:the group of youth, which, again, could
Speaker:be, you know, end user of your product. If
Speaker:you have a b, two b product, your end
Speaker:user, what are. You know, what are they
Speaker:thinking? What are they saying? How are
Speaker:they feeling? Are they receiving what I'm,
Speaker:you know, really, truly receiving what it
Speaker:is I'm trying to say? Because this is all
Speaker:about, you know, our growth, and our
Speaker:growth involves learning how to
Speaker:effectively communicate, recognizing it's
Speaker:a problem and what we are willing to give
Speaker:and do in order to fix that problem and
Speaker:implement the things that we've learned.
Speaker:And so you got these audiences, and I, you
Speaker:know, I love your response better than
Speaker:mine. My. My daughter is a praise dancer,
Speaker:and I, you know, full transparency. I got
Speaker:two left feet, but my daughter does not.
Speaker:She's wonderful. She could do
Speaker:choreography, all that. Imagine the style
Speaker:and the designs of the garments,
Speaker:everything. And so we were in Germany, and
Speaker:she was over at the dance ministry, and I
Speaker:was the adult over her, and it was kids.
Speaker:So there arose the situation won't go into
Speaker:the situation. At the end of the day, what
Speaker:the situation ended up being was a parent
Speaker:was unhappy with my decision not to allow
Speaker:their child to perform that Sunday. And
Speaker:the reason was the child had not been to
Speaker:enough practices to know everything
Speaker:correctly. And so she went and told the
Speaker:pastor, and they called me to the office
Speaker:and asked me about it, and I told him my
Speaker:reason. He told me what she said. She was
Speaker:sitting there and I turned and said, you
Speaker:need to grow up. Where else at in the
Speaker:world can you participate in any activity
Speaker:and you have not been involved in a
Speaker:preparation for said activity? Make it
Speaker:make sense, because at this point, we're
Speaker:all professionals. Right? Like, we're all
Speaker:professionals. Got a lot of letters behind
Speaker:our names. I paid a lot of money for these
Speaker:degrees. Why are we having this
Speaker:conversation that didn't go well with
Speaker:nobody? Like, the look on. I don't care
Speaker:about the look on her face at all. I'm, I
Speaker:was still growing. Tashandra was still
Speaker:growing. Yep. And the look on the pastor's
Speaker:face and his wife was like, wow, you just
Speaker:said that like that. Mm hmm. I did. For.
Speaker:No, don't do that, y'all. Don't do that.
Speaker:Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do
Speaker:that. Don't do what liquidity. Do what
Speaker:Tashandra did. Well, sometimes you have to
Speaker:learn that you, you don't always have to
Speaker:speak and then you just have to discern
Speaker:when. When is that time? When is it that
Speaker:time? When I, this is a time where I
Speaker:should actually hold my tongue. Do not say
Speaker:anything. I know a lot of times people
Speaker:might feel like they're not taking up for
Speaker:themselves or they're not speaking their
Speaker:truth or they're not. They're just letting
Speaker:somebody run over them. Sometimes it's
Speaker:wise to not say anything. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker:Which is thousand percent. It's hard,
Speaker:y'all. It's hard. But the payoff is great
Speaker:in the end. Yes, the payoff is great in
Speaker:the end. I mean, if we can honestly assess
Speaker:right now, and you guys, again, don't
Speaker:hesitate to reach out to us on your
Speaker:favorite podcast listening platform. Let
Speaker:us know in the comments, because you can
Speaker:leave comments on those platforms. Let us
Speaker:know in the comments what you think about
Speaker:today's conversation. Give us some
Speaker:scenarios. But if you were like, oh,
Speaker:Laquita, and enough space in the comments
Speaker:podcast, acquittamondley.com, go ahead and
Speaker:shoot me that email. And while you shoot
Speaker:me that email, you could go out to my
Speaker:website as well and join our podcast
Speaker:community where we continue in these types
Speaker:of discussions. Because, again, the
Speaker:purpose of Laquita's toolbox is to provide
Speaker:you tools that are easily implementable,
Speaker:that you can use to help yourself grow
Speaker:personally and professionally. And
Speaker:Tashandra is blessing us today with some
Speaker:tools on maturity and improving and
Speaker:growing in the space of effective
Speaker:communication. And right now, what she
Speaker:said is sometimes the wisdom is just to
Speaker:shut up. Don't say nothing. Don't say
Speaker:nothing. And that's amazing. Like, let's
Speaker:and talk a little bit more about why being
Speaker:quiet in those times can be actually more
Speaker:beneficial. And how do we know when to be
Speaker:quiet? I can give you an example that
Speaker:actually happened with me on my job. I'm
Speaker:not going to say where I work because I'm
Speaker:about to talk about the people. That
Speaker:person is an active listener. She may feel
Speaker:differently. Well, you know, but I'm
Speaker:going. I'm only going to say the truth. So
Speaker:every year we have a yearly bonus, and
Speaker:there was three supervisors who kind of
Speaker:get with the department head and they talk
Speaker:about everybody and how they did and
Speaker:what's their interaction with, you know,
Speaker:what their interaction was with each
Speaker:employee underneath them, and, you know,
Speaker:just how do they feel? We did overall,
Speaker:there was one supervisor in particular who
Speaker:did not care for me, and I don't know her
Speaker:reasoning. I just know that I will say
Speaker:every time she said something in a meeting
Speaker:that I knew was incorrect, I would correct
Speaker:her. That would probably be the reason,
Speaker:but go ahead. Well, because you have a
Speaker:team of people and you're supposed to be
Speaker:the person that they look to say, hey, I
Speaker:got a question about this. And she's given
Speaker:an answer and the answer is incorrect.
Speaker:Yeah, I have to correct it because then
Speaker:somebody's going to do something
Speaker:incorrect. Correct. Correct. So I will say
Speaker:that every time she says something that
Speaker:was incorrect, I would correct her. So
Speaker:they had this meeting. It was basically
Speaker:going to determine what our bonus was. And
Speaker:apparently, yes, she took issue and I
Speaker:didn't qualify for my bonus that year. Oh,
Speaker:my. Right. Oh, my. And so when the
Speaker:department head, we had a. A personal one
Speaker:on one meeting, and we talked and they
Speaker:were like, well, there was one person in
Speaker:particular that really had an issue. And
Speaker:because we didn't interact with you as
Speaker:much during this quarter, we had her to go
Speaker:off of it based on that. And so I was
Speaker:like, oh, okay. So what I wanted to say
Speaker:was, can you pull up the transcripts of
Speaker:these meeting when she's telling these
Speaker:employees the wrong information about them
Speaker:doing their reviews and everything and
Speaker:where that information was corrected? Who
Speaker:was that information corrected by? Can you
Speaker:pull up the review forms where she's
Speaker:reviewed accounts that I've done and
Speaker:purposely put things into the review that
Speaker:was not there and who corrected? I did.
Speaker:Right. But again, it wasn't my job to
Speaker:correct it. It was the department's head
Speaker:to job to correct. Right, right. So even
Speaker:though she was doing things she was not
Speaker:supposed to, I was also doing things I was
Speaker:not supposed to. So during this one on
Speaker:one, I just let the department head talk,
Speaker:and I didn't say anything. I was like,
Speaker:okay. I was, oh, my God, steaming mad. But
Speaker:I was like, okay. So I got off that
Speaker:meeting, and I clocked out. I was like,
Speaker:I'm going. I'm done. I am done. And when I
Speaker:get into my venting stage, I go in my
Speaker:room, I fuss to myself, or I might go in
Speaker:my car and drive and fuss, and people
Speaker:think I'm listening to the radio, but I'm
Speaker:fussing and saying everything I needed to
Speaker:say. And the craziest thing was, I was on
Speaker:a pilot program where the job that she has
Speaker:was basically set up by me. All right,
Speaker:come on. I didn't say. I didn't say, you
Speaker:know what? If it wasn't for me, you
Speaker:wouldn't even have this job. I didn't say
Speaker:any of that. I just said, okay. I went on
Speaker:my little venting. I was driving in my
Speaker:car, said everything that I wanted to say.
Speaker:It was just me, God, and the radio. And so
Speaker:I took two days off of work, went back to
Speaker:work. I was in my little stage where I was
Speaker:like, you know what? I'm gonna do the bare
Speaker:minimum. I'm not doing. I'm doing what I'm
Speaker:getting paid for. When you tell me to
Speaker:clock in, that's it. I'm doing the bare
Speaker:minimum. Then the department head started
Speaker:seeing a decline in things that I would
Speaker:do, and she wanted to have another meeting
Speaker:with me. She had another meeting, and she
Speaker:was like, you know, I was going to put you
Speaker:up for a promotion. And I was like, oh,
Speaker:no, I don't think I want to do. I don't
Speaker:think I want to do that. She was like,
Speaker:okay, well, just let me know, you know,
Speaker:whenever you're ready, we'll put you on
Speaker:that path and we'll try to get. I was
Speaker:like, okay, no problem. Not even, let me
Speaker:see. I don't even think it was another pay
Speaker:period. The person who had an issue with
Speaker:me. Mm hmm. She couldn't work anymore.
Speaker:Mmm. Wow. She couldn't work anymore.
Speaker:Nobody knew what happened. There was no
Speaker:PSA or anything. They were just like, oh,
Speaker:she's gonna be out for a while. We don't
Speaker:know how long she's gonna be out. We need
Speaker:somebody to help fill our spot. Kiss. You
Speaker:said, who you doing one of these? You?
Speaker:Cause, not me. So during the time when I
Speaker:wanted to scream at the top of my lungs
Speaker:and say, she didn't do this. She did this
Speaker:wrong. She didn't do this. Check this. I
Speaker:didn't say anything. When things came full
Speaker:circle, I had the opportunity to actually
Speaker:be promoted past her position. I didn't
Speaker:take that. And now I work in her position.
Speaker:But if I went off and said everything I
Speaker:wanted to say, none of. Those
Speaker:opportunities came to you. Yeah. Because
Speaker:that is not attractive at all. It's not
Speaker:attractive to anyone in business. It is
Speaker:not. Now, having a paper trail, having a
Speaker:record for something that's detrimental to
Speaker:the business, that's attractive. Very much
Speaker:so. But if it's a tiff in between two
Speaker:employees, nobody wants to hear, well, she
Speaker:said this, and she did that, and she did
Speaker:this. You're not showing accountability.
Speaker:You're not showing that you're capable for
Speaker:any growth within the company. You're not
Speaker:showing that you could be responsible for
Speaker:anyone else in the company. So that's not
Speaker:attractive. I held my tongue, and, yeah.
Speaker:Wow. Yeah. So, look, y'all, that was so
Speaker:much blessings in that story. I'm gonna,
Speaker:you know, summarize it real quick. We can
Speaker:find ourselves in situations where we're
Speaker:doing our very best. Matter of fact, we're
Speaker:going above and beyond what we are
Speaker:assigned to do. And then, through no fault
Speaker:of our own, of what we can see, there is
Speaker:an attack, whether it's on our character,
Speaker:the quality of our work, our integrity.
Speaker:You know, we've just been passed and done
Speaker:wrong. Whatever the case may be, you may
Speaker:find yourself in that position. And the
Speaker:takeaway from what Tysonra just said and
Speaker:her growth moment, because this is the
Speaker:moment. This is the test. That was the
Speaker:test. And then we got a growth moment. We
Speaker:got to glean something from it. What did
Speaker:we learn in that moment? Her decision to
Speaker:say nothing resulted in two promotion
Speaker:opportunities. One promotional opportunity
Speaker:to sit in the seat of the person who was
Speaker:actually giving her the problem to be
Speaker:promoted above that person's position. And
Speaker:why did that happen? Because the quality
Speaker:of her work was always impeccable. But
Speaker:more importantly than the quality of her
Speaker:work, Doctor King said the content of her
Speaker:character came out in this conversation
Speaker:with the suit with the head supervisor in
Speaker:her. Just saying, okay, I'm going to, as
Speaker:we say, take this to the head. I'm just
Speaker:going, you know, let this ride. I'm absorb
Speaker:this blow right here. I'm not gonna say
Speaker:anything. I'm still going to do what it is
Speaker:you're paying me to do. Mm hmm. And let's
Speaker:see what happens in the, what happened is
Speaker:the two opportunities for promotion. So
Speaker:there are significant times to be quiet. I
Speaker:also heard in that story, keep a paper
Speaker:trail. Listen. Yeah. You are entrepreneur,
Speaker:whether you are a w two earner, c suite
Speaker:exec, whatever the case may be. Keep a
Speaker:paper trail. Keep a paper trail. Contrary
Speaker:clients, for our entrepreneurs, contrary
Speaker:clients, vendors, collaborative partners.
Speaker:Keep a paper trail. Yep. So that when
Speaker:these situations arise, it's not if, it's
Speaker:when. Because it's going to happen. These
Speaker:situations arise. You have the ability to
Speaker:protect yourself and defend yourself if
Speaker:needed. But the important part is the
Speaker:discern when I need to do that versus when
Speaker:I need to just say, okay, got you, and
Speaker:keep moving forward. And so that was an
Speaker:amazing, amazing story right there.
Speaker:Tashandra, let me, and also, y'all, let me
Speaker:take a minute. Don't y'all forget to hit
Speaker:them, like share and subscribe buttons.
Speaker:Let's get this podcast out to as many
Speaker:people as possible. Possible. Because
Speaker:these types of tools, these right here,
Speaker:what you just said in that, in that story,
Speaker:in the last few minutes, that can change
Speaker:some people's lives. Yeah. Right. Thank
Speaker:you. Because it's so simple. Not easy to
Speaker:do, not easy, not easy, but real simple.
Speaker:And you can reap some great rewards from
Speaker:the simplest things, right? Yep. Look,
Speaker:this is, this conversation is real good to
Speaker:me. So we've been diving into aspects of
Speaker:effective communication, knowing what to
Speaker:say, when to say, how to say it, most
Speaker:importantly, understanding when to say
Speaker:nothing at all and the benefits that we
Speaker:can get from that. And so when you, when
Speaker:you're looking at that, because, so let me
Speaker:ask you, at this point in your life, were
Speaker:you already excited about the meaning of
Speaker:your name? No. At that point, I was kind
Speaker:of saying why it was at that. During that
Speaker:time, God was saying, this is your name.
Speaker:Embrace it. There's a reason why I'm
Speaker:calling you by this name. And as a matter
Speaker:of fact, he called my name audibly three
Speaker:times. And every time, all I thought was
Speaker:Samuel. That's all I thought, come on,
Speaker:now. And I, um, he called my name three
Speaker:times. And I was just like, but why? But
Speaker:why? So I didn't, I understood that
Speaker:that's, it had, there's a meaning there.
Speaker:There was a reason why I still was not in
Speaker:the place where I'm like, okay, I'm going
Speaker:to accept everything that you've called,
Speaker:everything that you've said over me. I
Speaker:wasn't in acceptance right then. Okay,
Speaker:okay. No, come on, listen. But he called
Speaker:it anyway. He called it anyway. And you
Speaker:heard it? I heard it three times, and I
Speaker:was sleeping. So that's another reason I
Speaker:was like, are you calling Samuel? For
Speaker:sure, for sure. Look, y'all, if y'all
Speaker:don't know the story of Samuel, for those
Speaker:of you who may not know that, para just go
Speaker:to Google and type in story of Samuel. In
Speaker:the Bible, it's called pop up. And it's
Speaker:amazing because he called his name three
Speaker:times. He recognized the voice, not the
Speaker:owner of the voice. And then someone had
Speaker:to tell him the leader had to tell him the
Speaker:leader at that time is named for. And I'm
Speaker:summarizing this in a way that everybody
Speaker:can understand, right? The leader. The
Speaker:leader where Samuel was serving at the
Speaker:time, his name was Eli. So he went because
Speaker:he kept going to Eli to say, what's up?
Speaker:You keep calling me what you want. And Eli
Speaker:was like, it is not me that is calling
Speaker:you. It's the Lord. So this is what you do
Speaker:next time with a head, let your answer be
Speaker:different. Speak, lord. Yes. Speak, lord.
Speaker:Servant is listening. Yes, thy servant is
Speaker:listening. How many of y'all are feeling
Speaker:that right now? But you feel that the Lord
Speaker:is calling you to something greater. He's
Speaker:capturing your attention, is your answer.
Speaker:Speak, lord. Thy servant is listening. Are
Speaker:we still at a place where we looking
Speaker:around like, who you talking to? Where
Speaker:this coming from? Who this man? How? Focus
Speaker:me about my sleep. I'm resting. And you
Speaker:call somebody calling me. It also in that
Speaker:story shows the significance, because, you
Speaker:know, in the beginning of your story, your
Speaker:dad played a significant role in your
Speaker:life. And so at this time in your life,
Speaker:you probably either you still have someone
Speaker:in your life that is in that capacity.
Speaker:Let's call it mentorship, like that. That
Speaker:is mentoring you in. In your comparison,
Speaker:in here. It's always a great idea, this
Speaker:life that we walk. We can't walk it alone,
Speaker:right? We gotta walk it with someone else.
Speaker:Samuel went to Eli. Yeah. Who did you go
Speaker:to? Tashandra. But more importantly, those
Speaker:in the listening audience, who do you go
Speaker:to? And if your answer is nobody, you got
Speaker:find somebody and make sure they are the
Speaker:right somebody. Yes, yes, yes. Come on
Speaker:now. You know, the crazy thing is, the
Speaker:voice that I heard, it was my dad's voice,
Speaker:but my dad had passed, so I knew it was
Speaker:the familiar. The familiar part of that
Speaker:voice was like that sound like my dad. But
Speaker:again, he had passed. So I knew it wasn't
Speaker:my dad. And that's why my next reaction
Speaker:was, speak, lord, your servant is
Speaker:listening. Yeah. The person that I go to
Speaker:will be my pastor. And he has always said,
Speaker:you know, I love you like you're my
Speaker:daughter. Like you're my own daughter. And
Speaker:at first I was like, okay, yeah. Cause
Speaker:he's a pastor. He gotta, you gotta love
Speaker:all of us like that. Right, right. I do
Speaker:that, sir, you better do your job. But he
Speaker:has been such a resource with my growth
Speaker:and with my walk with God. I understand.
Speaker:He says, I love you like you're my
Speaker:daughter. I understand it now. Yes, yes.
Speaker:He has been so instrumental in helping me
Speaker:along. He's been interpreting my dreams.
Speaker:He's been, which is mind blowing because
Speaker:I'm on that. What? What? Um. And then he
Speaker:basically lets me know because I'm, I'm a
Speaker:checks and balances type girl and God
Speaker:knows I don't want to. I used to think I
Speaker:was being annoying with my prayer saying,
Speaker:okay, but do you want me to do this? But
Speaker:do you want me to do this? What do you
Speaker:want me to do? This? Is it like this? Is
Speaker:it like this? And so now I don't do that
Speaker:anymore, but I will. He knows that I need
Speaker:some type of confirmation. He knows I'm
Speaker:one of those kids that I have always
Speaker:wanted to know that I was doing the right
Speaker:thing. I was supposed to do it. Yeah. And
Speaker:having reassurance was always big for. Me,
Speaker:and that's good. My pastor, he has
Speaker:instrumentally used him as my reassurance.
Speaker:He lives in a whole nother state now and
Speaker:he will call me and say, you know, I'm so
Speaker:proud of you. You are definitely doing
Speaker:what God told you to do. He'll say
Speaker:something very specific. And I was just
Speaker:going, oh my God. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay.
Speaker:Yeah. Sometimes we need that confirmation.
Speaker:We do. I'm a person that I definitely have
Speaker:to have confirmation. I'm, I'm all in. But
Speaker:I need to know that I'm all in for the
Speaker:right thing. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have to
Speaker:question whether I'm in or I'm out. I'm
Speaker:in. I just need to know that I'm in for
Speaker:the right thing. For the right thing.
Speaker:Yeah. The right way. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I
Speaker:love that. I love that. All in. All in.
Speaker:Man, we can unbox so many different things
Speaker:today. Doctor Hunter, you want to come
Speaker:back in for like two, three episodes?
Speaker:Usually I ask people to come back for one
Speaker:more. I'm asking you to come back for two,
Speaker:three more because, listen, look, we are
Speaker:here trying to grow personally and
Speaker:professionally and unlocking the different
Speaker:components of effective communication,
Speaker:mentorship, having an ear to hear and
Speaker:receive. Yeah, right. It does you no good
Speaker:to have a mentor if you don't listen to
Speaker:them. None at all. None at all. It does
Speaker:you no good to just receive a boatload of
Speaker:information if we don't take the time to
Speaker:learn how to implement it and turn that
Speaker:information into wisdom. Turn that
Speaker:knowledge into wisdom and not, you know,
Speaker:knowledge applied equals wisdom. Wisdom
Speaker:means taking what I've learned and caused
Speaker:it to bear fruit in some way. Yeah, in
Speaker:some way, it has bear fruit for me and the
Speaker:people connected to me. And I want to make
Speaker:sure we respect your time. But I have said
Speaker:that we was gonna talk about who God says
Speaker:podcast. So that's why we got to come
Speaker:back, you know, two, three more times,
Speaker:because some other stuff. But before you
Speaker:do. Before we do wrap this up, go on to
Speaker:drop the plug for who God says podcast and
Speaker:let people know how they can connect with
Speaker:you. Okay, so I am the host of who God
Speaker:says podcast. It's basically we're all on
Speaker:our spiritual journey, but we're all real
Speaker:people, and life happens. So how do we get
Speaker:through that as christians, as people,
Speaker:period. Like, how do we get through that?
Speaker:If you're not a christian, you still have
Speaker:standards. How do you live up to those
Speaker:standards and still go through everyday
Speaker:life? Still go through boyfriends and
Speaker:cheating, husbands and children acting
Speaker:crazy, and people getting on your nerves
Speaker:at the job, and you relate on your bills?
Speaker:How do we get through that and still stand
Speaker:on our principles? So that's what who God
Speaker:says is about. You can go to the
Speaker:website@whogosses.com you can see all of
Speaker:the past episodes. You can follow us on
Speaker:Instagram. What is it? It's x now, not
Speaker:Twitter. TikTok, Facebook. We're all over
Speaker:on all that stuff. Who got sis? And you
Speaker:can send me an email if you would like to
Speaker:be a part of the show or if there's
Speaker:anything that you feel like the church
Speaker:does not talk about that we should talk
Speaker:about, send me an email at who God
Speaker:saysmail.com. Oh, you gonna get a bunch of
Speaker:emails. That's one of my biggest things. I
Speaker:know a lot of times, church is too
Speaker:churchy, and they don't want to talk about
Speaker:real life. So I want to address
Speaker:everything. We just did a. Come on. We
Speaker:just did an episode about sex addiction.
Speaker:Nobody talks about that in church. Listen,
Speaker:come on, now. And one of the other things
Speaker:that they don't feel like that popped in
Speaker:my head and about that like sex addiction.
Speaker:But what the church also don't like to
Speaker:talk about a lot is women. We had a
Speaker:problem, too. A lot of us have been
Speaker:delivered from it, still going through it.
Speaker:But more importantly, because outdated was
Speaker:never right thinking that we don't have
Speaker:those desires in the first place. Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah, we do. Yep, we do. And we are here
Speaker:being predators. On the low. Yes, we have
Speaker:some of these poor, defenseless brothers.
Speaker:Ain't never see it comment and marriage.
Speaker:Don't fix it. That's not. It's not. It.
Speaker:Don't fix it. Look, I got it. I don't. I'm
Speaker:gonna listen to that one. And we don't
Speaker:talk about it. Look, who got says podcast.
Speaker:Y'all go out to who God says podcast?
Speaker:Calm, right? Who got says calm? Who got
Speaker:says.com? check out the podcast. Yours
Speaker:truly was a guest on the podcast. We have
Speaker:a great episode. You can find that episode
Speaker:actually on my YouTube channel as well. If
Speaker:you look under my guest appearances,
Speaker:you'll see my appearance on the who God
Speaker:says podcast. Y'all going out there, hit
Speaker:them, subscribe, and like buttons for who
Speaker:God says. Connect with her on social
Speaker:media. I assure you, you will be blessed
Speaker:by the content that you receive. So, you
Speaker:got anything coming up where we could
Speaker:connect support in any kind of way? Oh,
Speaker:the only thing I have coming up is more
Speaker:episodes. So, you guys, more episodes. I
Speaker:am stepping into a role that I don't want
Speaker:to say anything about, that I'm very
Speaker:nervous about. So I would accept your
Speaker:prayers. Amen. For strength and capacity
Speaker:to perform in Jesus name. Amen. And we
Speaker:would definitely be praying and covering
Speaker:you, woman of God, as you prepare to step
Speaker:into this role. I'm going ahead and say
Speaker:it. The Lord has already prepared you. You
Speaker:just got to accept it and walk in it,
Speaker:because let me just leave that right there
Speaker:for you. You are more than capable and
Speaker:more than ready. Yeah. Yeah. It's gonna be
Speaker:great. Look, for those of you also that
Speaker:are listening, coming up on July 11 and
Speaker:12th. And that's in less than two weeks,
Speaker:y'all. We have the tv media tour, and it
Speaker:will be right here in Killeen, Texas. Come
Speaker:one, come all. The tv media tour has been
Speaker:curated to be a blessing to micro and
Speaker:small business owners, where in this two
Speaker:days of workshops, not only will you
Speaker:understand the importance of community and
Speaker:collaboration, you will understand the
Speaker:importance and significance of digital
Speaker:media and digital effective digital media
Speaker:strategies. We will be having guests
Speaker:coming in from across the country teaching
Speaker:on an abundance of topics that is relevant
Speaker:to help you develop and grow your personal
Speaker:brand monetization and how to effectively
Speaker:enter into the digital marketing space
Speaker:with ads and having your your brand seen
Speaker:on tv. You don't want to miss it. July 11
Speaker:and 12th, right here in Killeen, Texas. Go
Speaker:out to tv www.tvmediatour.com. get
Speaker:registered. We want to see your amazing
Speaker:face in the place on those two days. And
Speaker:right now we are currently running a
Speaker:special for if you want to come and just
Speaker:enjoy the workshops, 150 to come in and
Speaker:enjoy the workshops. If you want to leave
Speaker:with a professionally written press
Speaker:release, professional photos, magazine
Speaker:articles, and tv interviews, gonna upgrade
Speaker:that to our regular package. And that
Speaker:package is $450, y'all. I'll see you all
Speaker:at the tv media tour in July. Until next
Speaker:time, I am your host, Laquita Manley. You
Speaker:guys be great and have an amazing rest of
